Humor at Home

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #30 on: July 07, 2006, 04:22:08 PM » by ~esposita~

As I was getting donner ready, Abigail (19 mos) was "helping" by getting out pots and pans. She got out my biggest pot and proceeded to climb into it. I chuckled and let her be. A couple minutes later, she walked up to me, carrying the pot and saying, "Pee! Pee!" Sure enough! It had pee in it! WOnt be cooking with THAT pot tonight Cheesy

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #31 on: July 07, 2006, 04:36:04 PM » by felmleyfam

that is hilarious! Potty training at its finest.

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #32 on: July 07, 2006, 05:15:37 PM » by SC

Yesterday was NOT a good mail day at our house -- at least for me. I received three pieces of "junk mail" that were cleverly disguised in regular envelopes to look like first class. My DH watched as I opened the first one. It was an offer to take part in medical test for women that suffered from "heavy menses" and PMS. "Who in ND thinks I have bad periods?" I wondered while opening the second mailer. It was an offer for a weight loss supplement that simply melts the pounds off while you sleep. "Great," I said out loud. "I've gotten on a mailing list for overweight people." I reluctantly picked up the last envelope. It was an offer for a $2000 line of credit. Before I could react to that, my DH said, "Hey, you could use the money to buy the weight loss supplement, AND help further medical science for women with PMS!" Angry

I wanted to throw papers at him, but I HAD to laugh. Cheesy

Today, when he brought the mail in and offered it to me, I said, "No, no, no, I can't take another bad mail day!" He just grinned and handed me the latest issue of NGJ.

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #33 on: July 08, 2006, 05:32:39 PM » by SC

In the ongoing saga of "How in the World did I get on THAT mailing list?"

Today's mail brought an advertisement addressed to me with the headline: "Proudly serving desperate housewives since 1977." The model had on long black gloves, black pumps, a sleeveless black dress and matching hat. Angry

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #34 on: July 08, 2006, 07:23:10 PM » by healthybratt

Quote from: SC on July 08, 2006, 05:32:39 PM

I'm almost afraid to ask what they were selling Huh

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #35 on: July 08, 2006, 10:18:18 PM » by 3boysmyjoys

I thought this was hilarious! Cheesy

My three year old niece was praying before bed the other night. This was what she said, "Jesus, you're the only stranger I ever loved."

Cheesy

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #36 on: July 08, 2006, 10:41:49 PM » by SC

Quote from: healthybratt on July 08, 2006, 07:23:10 PM

Quote from: SC on July 08, 2006, 05:32:39 PM

I'm almost afraid to ask what they were selling Huh

THAT was the OTHER thing that got me . . . It was for "professional housecleaning" that "can cure desperation."

On the list of things that CAUSE desperation in this life, dirt doesn't make my top 100! Cheesy

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #37 on: July 08, 2006, 11:35:04 PM » by healthybratt

Quote from: SC on July 08, 2006, 10:41:49 PM

On the list of things that CAUSE desperation in this life, dirt doesn't make my top 100! Cheesy

A little dirt won't hurt and a lot of dirt is just plain fun Grin

« Last Edit: July 09, 2006, 10:18:54 AM by healthybratt »
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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #38 on: July 09, 2006, 12:47:04 AM » by Helen

I was blow drying my hair with my son beside me in the bathroom, he got hold of the toothbrush and was chewing on it, all at once i realize that he is standing beside the toilet dipping his toothbrush and then brushing....... arrrrggggggg Angry

I decided to just give him a good parasite cleanse soon..................................

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #39 on: July 09, 2006, 11:13:29 AM » by Soñadora

Quote from: Helen on July 09, 2006, 12:47:04 AM

I decided to just give him a good parasite cleanse soon..................................

I didn't know whether to laugh or throw up a little when I read that. J/K Grin

When mine were little(er), they liked to "clean" with their toothbrushes. Sinks, walls, counters, toilet lids... It was pretty good though -- all I had left to do was wipe it all down. Roll Eyes

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #40 on: July 09, 2006, 11:30:50 AM » by floydian

My husband works in computers and often works on site. A couple of weeks ago he was supposed to go somewhere in the the midwest to do some computer work at an explosives plant. There were some problems however, and we found out that one of the problems was they had blown up one of their plants recently. (OH good!) Shocked

Anyway, whatever problems were being worked out, and he thought he would have to go last week. I told him playfully that no he couldn't go there and blow up, I wasn't going to be a widow with 6 kids. Cry

My little 2 yr old guy looked at us and said, "I can blow up. (Proceeds to blow up at the ceiling) See, I can blow up." Roll Eyes

We laughed. He still hasn't had to go to that plant yet. Wink

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #41 on: July 09, 2006, 06:27:56 PM » by ~esposita~

Quote from: Helen on July 09, 2006, 12:47:04 AM

I decided to just give him a good parasite cleanse soon..................................

This morning I stepped outside to go look at my morning glories that I almost killed (I sprayed Tansy Vinegar on them to kill the Japanese beetles - oops. Not recommended - but thats another story...) On my way back into the house I happened to look through the window to see my little girl happily chewing on the fly swatter! ICK ICK ICK!!!

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #42 on: July 09, 2006, 06:38:02 PM » by healthybratt

Quote from: bajusabroad on July 09, 2006, 06:27:56 PM

On my way back into the house I happened to look through the window to see my little girl happily chewing on the fly swatter! ICK ICK ICK!!!

My husband would say, it's just extra protein. GAG. Tongue

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #43 on: July 09, 2006, 08:36:32 PM » by healthyinOhio

We had discussed as a family the part in the Bible where it says "....the fat is the Lords". Our daughter looked at her chubby younger brother and said: " Well, I guess Mike belongs to God!"

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #44 on: July 09, 2006, 09:34:46 PM » by healthybratt

Quote from: healthyinOhio on July 09, 2006, 08:36:32 PM

We had discussed as a family the part in the Bible where it says "....the fat is the Lords". Our daughter looked at her chubby younger brother and said: " Well, I guess Mike belongs to God!"

Oh, GOOD, now I have proof that I am also one of God's children. Wink

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #45 on: July 11, 2006, 10:49:00 AM » by dara

My husband can't stand to waste anything, so he was outside setting some fallen over comfrey to sun dry, and when he came in a few minutes later I noticed he smelled like he'd been smoking- only he doesn't. I had to ask. "Well", he said, "That comfrey looks a lot like tobacco, and one of the leaves was already dry, so I just had to light it to see how it burns. It burns like tobacco, too."

So now I'm wondering, if he smokes comfrey, will it heal him up as fast as it wears him down? Grin

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #46 on: July 11, 2006, 10:51:40 AM » by dara

My 5 yo and I were doing his reading lesson, and he came across the word "kelp". He asked what it was, and I told him it was an edible seaweed. "Oh," he said, "Fishfood, like your Supermom vitamins. Stinky stinky!"

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #47 on: July 21, 2006, 04:17:20 PM » by OnlyJesusSaves

My almost 4 year old said while Daddy holding him "When I get bigger and bigger and you get smaller and smaller, I'll take care of you".

"I like my baby brother, he is sooo cute."

I said my son what he likes best about mommy. He said your hair. So I said, your going to have to marry someone with long hair, yes was his reply. He is always twisting, smelling, holding, rubbing my hair. It started when he was a baby and I would let him play with my hair.

My almost 11 month old is so funny when his gets excited, he will kick and flap his arms in all directions with the cutes little grin.

Let my here about your cute little kids

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #48 on: July 21, 2006, 05:02:30 PM » by mexmarr

My 2 1/2 dd was watching her Daddy through the window as he drove up from work. She looked and me and said, "He's a good Daddy, isn't he!"

I enthusiastically agreed!

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #49 on: July 21, 2006, 06:01:32 PM » by healthyinOhio

I actually broke out a "boxed" organic macaroni and cheese for the kids. This is my daughter's favorite thing to eat. When she found out that we were having it for lunch, today, she said, "Mom, life isn't unbearable anymore!" She is only 8. Where do they come up with this stuff?

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #50 on: July 23, 2006, 05:57:43 PM » by OnlyJesusSaves

Last night my almost 4 year old said, "It's almost my birthday and I'll be this many (holding up 4 fingers). Then this many (5 finger held up). You know I'm almost a man, see (showing me his arm) I have little hairs popping up. I just laughted and said yes your becoming a man. NV

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #51 on: July 23, 2006, 07:25:29 PM » by WithLoveAndJoy

I don't have any kids to tell cute stories on myself...but my dad always brings up one that I said when I was about three years old.

We had been at church that morning and we were on the way home when I asked Dad, "Daddy, what is God's last name?" I figured that Christ was Jesus' last name and that the Holy Spirit's last name was Spririt....can you blame a kid for askin? Wink

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #52 on: July 23, 2006, 10:47:30 PM » by joyful_mommy_03

My hubby used to touch my daughter's nose and say "honk honk" and she'd squeal. She's also heard a car beep it's horn and we've always said "honk honk" afterward. So now she has logically put the two together - every time she hears a car beep, she touches her nose and says "honk honk"! I just think it's the cutest!!

My daughter is 19mos and my youngest son is 4mos. When I set my son on the bed, if he gets excited, he starts kicking his legs like crazy. My daughter will sit down next to him and kick her legs too - she just giggles and giggles!

I also love the way she says water - whad-a-ner.

I love my kids!!!! Grin

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #53 on: July 23, 2006, 11:10:26 PM » by refreshed

My 3-1/2-year-old son was lifting bricks up above his head today and grunting. He put them down, looked at my husband and me and showed us his muscles. Then he scrunched up his face and said, "Look, Dad! I'm as strong as lightning!" Cheesy

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #54 on: July 23, 2006, 11:24:23 PM » by jaemom

When my son was little I used to beep his nose too. One day we were talking about the sounds the animals made. I said, "What says quack quack?". He replied, "A duck". A few minutes after the "game" was over he said, "Mommy! What says 'beep, beep'?". I replied, "A car." He said, "No Mommy, my nose says beep beep!" Grin

Ever since then all my babies have thought their noses say beep beep.

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #55 on: July 24, 2006, 07:09:07 AM » by ~esposita~

Quote from: joyful_mommy_03 on July 23, 2006, 10:47:30 PM

My hubby used to touch my daughter's nose and say "honk honk" and she'd squeal.

Our daughter "honks" her nose each time she sees a goose in her animal books Grin

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #56 on: August 02, 2006, 12:47:38 PM » by KatieMac

I foolishly left the small honey bottle in the vicinity of my 3 year old and then walked away to do something for a few minutes. When he finished his peanut butter he poured a large amount of honey on his plate. When I came back his hands were coated and he was gleefully licking it off. "Look momma...I'm a hungry bear eating honey! Bears love honey, fish and berries!"

After that nature lesson I couldn't get mad...it was my fault after all Grin

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #57 on: August 05, 2006, 04:20:18 PM » by healthybratt

My daughter asked me what was in the kefir jar last night. I told her that I was feeding some "critters" with juice. Today we had some kombucha for lunch. I bottle the kombucha and the kefir in the same bottles, so she thought we were having kefir (I suppose) and she told her brother that we were having "critter juice". Grin

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #58 on: August 05, 2006, 05:21:49 PM » by ~esposita~

Yesterday, our 20 mos old daughter went to work with her Papa in the shop. Andrew had to unload some tools from a car, so gave her two sets of wrenches, one for each hand, and instructed her to bring them into the shop. Off she went, as well as she could. Well, she didn't make it very far...the wrenches being heavy and all. She lowered them to the floor, while still holding them and started to cry in frustration. Andrew, coming to her rescue, picked up both wrench sets in one hand and told her she did a wonderful job. Immediately, Abbi stopped crying and looking at Andrew said, "WOW!! Wow! Papa, WOW!!"

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Re: Humor at Home
« Reply #59 on: August 05, 2006, 06:48:46 PM » by annafogg1

All my kids agree, hands down, the our baby, 4 yr old Sarah Rose, is the funniest Fogg kid to date. When she was 2, we spent a long, long day at a beach in Delaware with another visiting family. After the beach, we always go to the showers and wash out sand, especially in hair and in certain areas of girls where sand collects. On the way home, everyone was knocked out in both cars in 5 minutes from all of the surfing and building of sandcastles and such, but Sarah Rose, the baby, couldn't stop fidgeting and wiggling. Finally, we stopped to get gas and coffee, and I went around to her carseat to see if her straps needed adjusting, I asked her just what the problem was. I couldn't believe that after an hour she was still wide awake. She gave me a look I'll never forget and said with utmost clarity, "Mama, I think I've still got a sandcastle in my butt!" Oh, my gosh, my husband and I could barely drive that last hour back home.

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